The art of losing weight

Good news for all wannabes out there who're envious of my weight loss!! A handful of my readers have taken turns in making my life miserable by constantly stalking me online asking away questions on how I have "lost so much weight". Phew! Somehow I feel it's more fun and easy to be round and roly poly than struggle (in vain, frustration, and desperation) to get into a size zero like our neurotic, anorexic, reed-thin role models.

However, since I've managed to lose weight, pretty successfully too, I'm going to act like this amazing fitness guru and give away my secretly guarded mantra for success. Without asking for a single penny (despite being a poor housewife) in return for my bada bing secret. Seriously!

Okay now the bad news... there's no real hard-hitting secret formula. I swear! I really have no clue why I've lost a lot of weight in a few months' time. It's just a bit of an idiotic routine and diet regime that I follow nowadays I guess. Oh puhleeeeeeezzzzz! Not strict crash diet routines for me. I have never tried those awful vegetable juice+clear soup+salad+sprouts+apple kind of diets (rather they never worked for me) so I won't suggest that to anyone either.

So there are a few cool things that I've been following for the past eight months. Only after everybody around started noticing and glorifying my so-called weight loss have I realized that I've finally succeeded at something without actually making an effort... never really put my heart and soul into.

I wish I had this kind of success with my projects without so much as ruffling a strand of my hair back in those working days... Anyway, below are a few things I do remember doing.

• Get up everyday at 6 a.m. sharp (though the alarm is usually set to 5.30 - shhh, now that's a secret).
• Drink coffee in a hurry so it literally scalds the tongue before the first student walks in at 7.15. Take no break for the next 3 hours, and tutor three batches of students.
• Is stomach growling? Make proper breakfast or eat left-over noodles, a couple of biscuits, or two slices of toast. Round it off with chai while watching stupid saas-bahu serials. You'll be done in less than 5 minutes, trust me - unless you've loads of patience to sit through a sit-com.
• Start cooking for lunch straightaway, unless there's work that involves stepping out of the house, and get done with it in half-an-hour! Mostly I end up making easy-to-cook things like tomato rice, vangi bhath, pulihora, khichdi, lemon rice, curd rice, etc. I do make an elaborate affair with dhal, rice, rasam, sabji, chutney/ pulusu - but it all depends on my mood and what the beti wants to eat that day!
• Keep chatting with friends till daughter returns. Give her food, make her sleep and return to chatting. No, I don't eat immediately. That's something I've learned after leaving my last organization. I eat ONLY when I get hungry. Otherwise, I don't mind waiting till past 3 p.m. too, or even skipping my meal if I'm not too hungry.
• Wake up daughter, help her study (and yell at her in the process at the top of your voice as often as you can - that way you can burn a lot more calories).
• Walk down to the beach/ temple/ in-laws' house - basically anywhere you want to, and for however long you want. Sometimes I walk a couple of times end to end in our half-an-acre plot while supervising the work.
• Have a light early dinner (mostly idli, dosa, roti, utappam, upma etc) - say before 8.30 p.m. Read a book or newspaper or chat till you go to bed (preferably before midnight).

Here's the gist of my current mottos:

1. Eat with your mouth, not with your mind.
2. Never eat when you're not hungry.
3. Don't indulge in greedy eating.
4. Don't neglect snacks and chai in between meals :P
5. Eat heartily whatever you can lay your hands on and whenever you want to.
6. Don't forget to walk everyday - 'just keep walking, just keep walking, just keep walking' in true Dory style. :)

And these are what keep me going, keep me fit, make me slim, and make me happy. Amen!