Friday, December 18, 2009

Things you can do when you turn 35

I just figured out that turning 35 isn't that bad after all. For one, it's not an everyday affair. Moreover, it has its own set of advantages I feel. Well, in my case at least there were quite a few benefits. Like figuring out and listing the top most interesting things one can do on one's special day, for instance. And here goes my list!
  • Try to find ways to enjoy the most quietest and loneliest birthday ever.
  • Just sit and sulk happily for the whole day without being disturbed.
  • No job, no party, no cake - so no cake smashing too (thank God for small mercies) - and all this translates to no spending money! Yay yay! WINK!!
  • Use your bad mood as an excuse for not cooking the whole day and use up all the left-overs from the fridge.
  • Keep staring at the beach and behave like you're brooding over something meaningful and serious.
  • Make a fuss, throw a tantrum, and tell everyone who cares to listen that the lack of company is driving you crazy.
  • Answer all phone calls and emails non-enthusiastically triggering off the panic button in all your well-wishers.
  • Secretly enjoy the many birthday wishes that keep coming your way through the day while behaving like your birthday is no big deal since you're getting old anyway.
  • Raid the house of unsuspecting in-laws on the pretext of helping them with downloading the pictures of their grandchildren and let your daughter slip in that it's your birthday today.
  • Sit on their computer downloading Picassa, Chrome, Skype and everything else you can while mom-in-law tries to make your day much more special by stirring up a kheer quick and yummy!
  • Mutter a shy 'thank you, you didn't have to do this...' but enjoy the kheer anyway.
  • Write nasty emails at the end of the day to friends who forgot to wish you and make them feel guilty for the rest of the year.
  • Threaten whoever called you that you'll send headless horseman after them if they don't send a nice gift (wrapped in glittering pink giftwrapper with prominent red hearts and a flashy red ribbon) by speed post.
  • Drift off into a dreamy sleep feeling elated and satisfied about the number of calls you received through the day - the more the number of calls, the more people love you and care about you!
  • Now, do away with all the bad thoughts and ONLY think about people who care for you rather than those who deliberately hurt.
  • And finally, fall asleep feeling very very contented with life!

3 comments:

Bhavani said...

who the hell is hurting u so much, tell me I'll KILL them.
Bhavs

Usha said...

:) I don't rem any threats about headless horsemen. And really can't recollect the last time I gave u a gift for your b'day. Was it 1996? Shady on my part, I admit :P

memories said...

@Bhavs, I prefer to kill people with looks (ask Ruthie for the Telugu version of the Balakrishna dialogue :P)
@Usha, Be happy I was being nice to you and didn't ask you for gift... but the major reason was that the call got cut (remember?) and you never called back :P