To SR... with love!

The day almost ended. So it has come and gone.... Another Friendship Day. But was I supposed to make some extra effort on my part to make it special, unlike other days, I wonder! Then, I'm sorry I didn't. Oops, maybe I shouldn't exist after this day for not being a proper-and-active part of the new era! 

And that makes me wonder if Friendship Day of the current era is limited to a couple of lines to drive home friendly wishes (loud and clear) to loved/ dear/ dahling friends, and acknowledgments/ likes/ same-to-you-toos on popular social networking sites, SMS exchanges, and a few calls from my own close friends wishing me 'A Very Happy Friendship Day' (which, by the way, slipped out of my mind completely)...

Just when I was wondering about all this, a whiff of fresh air brought in fond memories of SR, a very very close childhood friend of mine. Now what do I say about her... except that she has seen me in my teen years, and shared all my secrets and insecurities, joys and sorrows, has grown with me during the three years in Indo-English High School where we studied Std. VII to Std. IX together. 

She was privy to all important information of my teen life like my first crush on my classmate - a tall, dark Muslim boy who used to remind me so much of Azharuddin; the next one on my senior for whom I would wait near the school gate and all he ever did was lift his eyes and just give me a shy smile before cycling away. Oh yes, my crush on my Maths teacher in ninth class never caught her unawares. Only recently did I get to know (from SR herself of course) that I had a contender in another classmate (who was fairer and taller than I) for the same teacher's attention... :) And yes, SR even knew about my first love. She was my first Best Friend for all purposes.

But then, like all good things that come to an abrupt end, our blossoming friendship had to discontinue because of dad's transfer to another city. We used to write letters once a while for a few months but new surroundings, new friends, ensuing new college environment, and then the additional burden of semi-adulthood did come between us. But we did meet a couple of times, after dad's transfer back to Hyderabad three years later, and exchanged information on what we're doing currently. And then, that was it. We lost touch completely. I guess I never really forgot my best friend but I had many other friends too... and I sometimes used to think about her and wonder where have I lost her and how do I find her in this big bad world...

I guess my attempts to trace her were never adequate. SR beat me to it too - like she used to in good ol' days with her logical analyses. Here I must admit that I somehow was reckless and never really tried to look her up and connect with her on any social networking site though I was active on a few for the past few years. But she never gave up on me. She kept relentlessly trying to trace me eversince we lost touch some two decades ago - though the only details she had of me were my name (the spelling of which changed later), maiden surname (which changed after my marriage), my father's name and work info. That's about it. And still she pursued it - using the most modern technology... the powerful medium called Internet.

I never really understood the power of the Internet till I received an email recently, forwarded by a cousin late one evening. Like most non-techies, I took the Net for granted and kind of (ab)used it just to socialize with friends, and to keep tabs on others' lives. Disgusting? Yeah, you bet! But my respect for people who're behind the IT revolution grew many-fold when I received the best email forward that put me on cloud nine. 

It was from SR. All the crucial information which she thought would help her didn't do her any good. Then she made her final move... instead of trying to find me, she traced a couple of my cousins (thanks to the celebrity writer status of my maternal uncle) and sent them emails introducing herself and asking for my details. Both my good samaritan cousins promptly forwarded her email to me. My smart younger cousin even sent me her FB profile. Thanks to them, and thanks to my friend's perseverance, energy, and dedication, we got back in touch again. 

And our re-union in Hyderabad during this summer vacation was one of the sweetest memories that I'll cherish forever, and carry with me to my grave. So, Mr. Charles Babbage, I thank thee from the bottom of my heart! 

For you SR, I have just these three simple, little words - love you hamesha! And on this Friendship Day, I dedicate this post to you, your amazing personality, and your truly undaunted spirit !!

No IGNOU, only Univ... UFFFFF!!

After a restless, sleepless and seemingly endless night, laughter, mirth and amusement would be the last things on anyone's mind. And if you've had one of those serious discussions (a.k.a 'big fight') with your spouse late at night (that led to the insomnia in the first place), you can hardly imagine the sun to shine as bright as ever in the morning! But when a phone call wakes you up in a totally confused and drowsy state when you're almost asleep and sleep-talking during most part of the conversation - hardly aware of what you're thinking or saying - you certainly would end up providing comic relief to the caller and make his day!

Though I've always been popular (especially at work) for providing comic relief, my wit and sense of humour go for a toss when my anger reached its boiling point the previous night. And not being the one to easily forget and move on, the brooder in me constantly keeps reminding me of the need for Kleenex every few minutes.

And so S was caught completely off guard when he called in the morning to find out how wifey dear is doing after last night's lost-temper-coupled-with-copious-tears-n-controlled-sobs. No wonder, S called many times later in the day to thank me for 'making his day' after a tension-filled night!

There definitely is something comical about me. Read on to decide if you agree with me!

Tring tring... tring tring... tring tring and many more trings later...

S: Hello, how're you?

Me: (Totally drowsy) Fine.

S: Are you driving? You took so long to pick up the call.

Me: Sleeping.

S: Oh okay. Well, I'll call you later then.

Me: Okay. Hey tell me one thing...

S: Yeah? 

(I wonder if he expected me to ask him if he still loves me since I fought so bitterly in the night. That would have been the typical me. But somehow that was the last of my worries. I guess I had more pressing things on mind.)

Me: Did I complete my M.A.?

S: WHAT?

Me: Did I finish my M.A. or no?

S: Of course you did. Why are you asking?

Me: Then why are you asking me to complete it from IGNOU?

S: (Thoroughly bewildered) When did I ask you to do so?

Me: Never mind. I want to complete my M.A. from University (meaning University of Hyderabad), not IGNOU. Or was it ANGRAU?

S: (Burst out laughing) But you completed it already from University. You had U.M., D.A., and XYZ (now I forget the other name S mentioned, pardon me) for your classmates. And you were taught by teachers like Prof. Merchant.

Me: Whatever... I still want to do it from University only. Since anyway I'm not working or doing anything right now I want to complete the second year in University only.

(I can hear S's continuous, uncontrolled laughter in the background. But I had to fight my case and prove my point).

Me: I've already told my tuition students that I've completed my M.A. in English from the University. So I can't let them know that I've another year to study and I shouldn't do it from IGNOU. If they find out, my students will stop coming to me for tuition.

(Bah, why is he laughing non-stop and interrupting my thought process... nonsense!)

S: (Says in a sympathetic tone, after taking a short break from his evil laughter) Okay you can complete it now, I mean immediately. Just sleep now and when you wake up, you'd have completed your studies. Good luck and goodnight!

Me: Yeah, okay, bye!

Now who wouldn't want to forgive, love, and live with such a silly spouse! 

In the era of... err... what can I say?

Okay! I agree there have been a spate of scams in the recent past - starting with CWG... So?

I woke up one fine day to realize that the Games that everyone was so excited about is as tainted as a tinted glass. I can still understand and empathize with the enthusiasm of every average Indian like me... and also sympathize with Mr. Kalmadi in the same breath. After all, it's a question of a whopping Rs. 160 crore. Now tell me which 'honest' person will not succumb to devilish temptation with such an amount at his disposal. It's really cruel and evil to think that s/he shouldn't. So, I have no problem with Mr. Kalmadi's theft... in fact, I think he's super cool and I appreciate his deftness, boldness, confidence and what not!

Next what do I hear of? The town is painted red with the news about the great Adarsh Housing Society scam! Where's the scam about that, I say! The poor CM was made to resign for such a small offence. He made just a few bucks for his services to his State. Big deal! Why should we grudge him his 'small benefit' for his huge sacrifices as a CM. Don't you realize how Mr. Chavan has had to sacrifice his time, energy, family life, career prospects, health, personal space, privacy, and everything else you can think of just to serve you all as the CM. What ungrateful fellas we all are!  

And just when I was coming to terms with a few 'minor' aberrations, the news about the 2G Spectrum scam hit the news stands and the channels. Wah Wah! India is progressing at a faster pace, I must admit. Here again, I've my sympathies with Mr. Raja and his DMK boss(es). I've no qualms about the Rs. 1.76-lakh crore that was laundered. Come on, so what if there's a loss to the exchequer, the money is gone into 'safe' hands. Trust me Mr. Raja, I'm with you on this!

And then I hear of another spectrum controversy - with ISRO being involved this time. This, I have to admit, was the only time I felt a bit shaky. I don't mind any organization being part of any scam - major or minor. I only don't want to lose sleep over the fear of an impending nuclear war. That's my only lookout. As long as I can have a relaxed and peaceful sleep at nights (or whenever I want to for that matter) without thinking about dark nights and bullet/ cannon sounds. What's the connection, you might ask! I don't know either. I just thought I'll make up some silly-yet-grand theory about ISRO misusing (err... I meant using) SLV technology to launch super wars against all super powers on Earth and Mars and Jupiter and Mercury. Sounds cool, na?   

All was well till the Radia tapes were out! Now what I really can't stand is the involvement of those stupid petty journalists. How dare they try to get themselves entangled in such a scummy scam mess! I don't hate corruption or corrupt people! But what I don't like is... getting caught! And what's worse, making a blatant show of it! Maybe, maybe... all this negative propaganda pays off the likes of BD in the end. Let's wait and watch! In the meantime, I wish BD and colleagues good luck! 

While on corruption, what about the sanctions given to her home State by our honorable Railway Minister, Madame Mamta? You call it partiality? I call it favoritism. You call it injustice? I call it diplomacy. You call it selfishness? I call it indirect self-interest. As simple as that. (Oh that also reminds me another slightly related incident...)

However, what I don't understand is why are Indians waking up suddenly, and crying hoarse for heaven's sake? Hasn't any of this happened before? Let's please go back to sleep and rest peacefully. Please play a deaf ear to everything around. That's much better and safer than taking to the streets, and showing (y)our discontent with protests akin to those being held at the moment by our fellow citizens across the globe. It's not really worth the effort, I'm telling you.

This is not the era of do or die. This is not even the era of live and let live. This is the era of enjoy and forget about everything else. This is the era of if you can't be happy, snatch the others' happiness too. Most importantly, this is the era of scams and make money schemes. And once you make the money, don't forget to stow it in super cool Swiss accounts. :P

So, why are you bent upon wasting your time? Stop acting NOW if you are thinking in terms of rallies, revolution, ending corruption, jaagte raho... It all sounds good on TV and in magazines. If you don't wanna pay heed to what I say, please keep me out of the consequences. And don't complain later that I didn't warn you!

What's my next adventure?

"Imagine yourself many years from today. Will you look at your life with even a little dismay?" 
- Michelle C. Ustaszeski

And that's exactly what I am trying to do - imagining myself many years from now... as a sexagenarian relaxing with a book (while Mozart composes brilliant pieces exclusively for me in the background) in a rocking chair in front of the fireplace in my very own study room with a shawl draped on my frail shoulders. Picture Perfect! That got me thinking - about quite a few things actually.

So what sort of woman am I? I still wander aimlessly, wondering aloud, in search of the right words to describe myself. With two love affairs, two marriages, a divorce, a daughter, and six jobs to my credit what's it that's driving me to push all the limits of a cocooned life I had experienced in the first 22 years of my life?

Despite the mental conditioning, the orthodox upbringing, the traditional environment in and around home, I guess I had secretly nurtured a spirit of adventure, confidence, individuality, hotheadedness, arrogance, ego, obstinacy, recklessness, pride, restlessness, and independence... without which I don't think I'd be where I'm today. Simply following my heart everywhere, comfortably making myself home in a nowhere land, picturing myself  as a senior citizen, and looking forward to my next adventure.

If it weren't for my rebellious nature combined with an adventurous attitude, I wouldn't have jumped headlong into another relationship/marriage after miserably failing the first time. Probably I wouldn't have thought of packing my bags without a second thought and moving to the countryside to try out yet another adventurous lifestyle - hitherto unknown to me. But... as always, I just followed my heart - without letting my head take control of my wants and dreams.

Never once did it occur to me that I'll be many many miles away - far from my hometown, my lovely bunch of friends, family, well-wishers, supporters, sympathizers, loved ones... in fact, all those who matter to me, and who believe I'm important to them! This isn't the first time that I'd recklessly embarked on a new journey - to live absolutely alone, except for a six-year-old chatter box for company - amid strangers under strangest circumstances.

If it weren't for my stupid sense of superiority, super confidence and trust in my own ability, I wouldn't have pushed the limits of my smooth-sailing life-boat, and sailed offshore! Am I regretting any of these happenings? Nope. Not at all. Quite the contrary actually. I'm enjoying every bit of it as I slowly learn to live each day. "If you don't think everyday is a great day, try going without one," says Jim Evans. How very true indeed! And I have this philosophy in life: everything I do, I do it for myself, for fun, for happiness, for experience - and in the process I learn some, I gain some, I lose some and I keep going. Just keep going, just keep going, just keep going...

Oh yes, I did hear a lot about patience being a virtue, patience paying off in the end, patience this patience that... like I care! Sincerely speaking, I've no patience. Absolutely none! All I knew in these 36 years of my life are impatience, restlessness, and impulsiveness. And I'm happy the way I am because it keeps me going - despite the hurt, the loss, the wound, the ego, the everything. True guys, I love myself and my attitude, and my sense of adventure. Because underneath all the layers of friendliness, sensitiveness, kindness, gentleness and all the other 'ness's, I'm as strong, as arrogant and as adamant as any princess of repute. :P 

So..., my ego prompts me every now and then, what's on your list next? Okay you tell me, what next?

Jaago re... you say! Yes, but how?

I was recently watching the Jaago Re-Tata Tea ad about 'donation' for a college seat and the ensuing half-a-minute mini-lecture on corruption in the education system. It reminded me of this little (okay, not-so-little) episode that happened a few months ago on board the Prashanti Express during my trip to Bangalore for a close friend's wedding.

Our tickets got confirmed only in the last minute despite booking it two days in advance (that too in Tatkal). And when we got into the train it was so full it wasn't funny. Luggage was stuffed under all the three berths with not so much as an inch of space for our really cutesy small single suitcase. But we did manage to magically tuck it in. After breakfast, I had calmed down enough from the fretting-fuming-frustration, and  settled to enjoy the coolness of the AC coach while taking note of my surroundings and co-passengers.

A middle-aged couple, a young married girl, another young guy, besides a bunch of young Wipro employees who were returning to Bangalore from their conference-cum-fun trip at Bhubaneswar, were to keep us company for the next 26 hours. Fine! But what wasn't fine was the way 12 people (four of whom had Sleeper Class tickets) were seated in a eight-seater coupe! The TC didn't seem to have a problem with that! So far so good!

Now starts our real (read juicy and gossipy) story... Once upon a time there lived a queen bee who wanted to travel to Bangalore... To cut a very long story short, let me begin with my reaction and then proceed further. I was very impressed initially with the bee and her battalion, and the bubbly atmosphere in the compartment. But let me admit that I was totally shocked when I realized that the queen bee (or should we call her 'Her Royal Highness' for the treatment she had received through the journey), who made herself extremely comfortable in cool red-and-black striped pyjamas and off-white kurta, doesn't even have a confirmed ticket?

So who is this HRH? Called Naksha, this bubbly employee of Wipro seemed to be the blue-eyed daughter/daughter-in-law of a well-connected dad, and/or dad's best friend-cum-future father-in-law. It all looked quite mysterious as I tried to figure out which among the two big guys is a top cop. Of course, I couldn't solve the mystery to this date.

Anyway... thanks to madame Naksha, our compartment was the most sought-after at every station (big and small) that the train stopped. At every halt, two cops in mufti would get in, ask for madam-of-seat-number-so-and-so, salute HRH, pass her packets of chips, biscuits, bottles of Coke/Sprite/ Fanta... you name it! It was fun to watch for an hour or two as our compartment was getting the attention of the entire Railway Police Force, the TC, the Station Master and every Tom, Dick and Harry.

But as evening gave way to night, I started getting irritated with the people swarming in and out of the coupe. It was peak summer and the AC in the compartment was not sufficient with so many of HRH's personal attendants, friends-cum-colleagues and well-wishers visiting her at regular intervals. The TC, unfortunately, couldn't confirm her RAC ticket till late in the night, and post 10 p.m. the visitors at the station kept waking us up not knowing madam's new berth number.

Gawd! I would have died of shame for putting so many people through hours of inconvenience and torture. But HRH Naksha was oblivious to all this as she was not only enjoying the attention but also looked like this treatment is not really new to her. And all this made me wonder... if this is not corruption at its most base level, then what is! I was feeling worse thinking about all the time, money and energy of the RPF jawans that was spent on pleasing/impressing one woman - all for the sake of promotion, recognition or whatever favor they're after.

I agree there is no happy ending to this story - but that is purely because the moral of my story is bitterly clear: As long as there are Nakshas in this world, there's bound to be corruption.

So let's just go with the slogan - 'Long live HRH, and long live corruption'!